STOP DOMESTIC & SEXUAL VIOLENCE SERVICES

Confidential safe dwellings are available for those in need and eligible for temporary shelter. Safe dwelling residents can take care of immediate needs and assess long range plans for a safe environment while utilizing the support and assistance of staff.

After business hours, volunteers staff the hotline with staff providing back-up coverage. To volunteer, individuals must complete a 12-hour training on domestic violence and its effects, dedicate a few hours a week for at least 6 months, and attend volunteer meetings. If interested please e-mail STOP Domestic Violence for more information.

Abuse may begin with behaviors that may easily be dismissed or downplayed such as name-calling, threats, possessiveness, or distrust. Abusers may apologize profusely for their actions or try to convince the person they are abusing that they do these things out of love or care. However, violence and control always intensifies over time with an abuser, despite the apologies. What may start out as something that was first believed to be harmless (e.g., wanting the victim to spend all their time only with them because they love them so much) escalates into extreme control and abuse (e.g., threatening to kill or hurt the victim or others if they speak to family, friends, etc.). Some examples of abusive tendencies include but are not limited to:

• Telling the victim that they can never do anything right
• Showing jealousy of the victim’s family and friends and time spent away
• Accusing the victim of cheating
• Keeping or discouraging the victim from seeing friends or family members
• Embarrassing or shaming the victim with put-downs
• Controlling every penny spent in the household
• Taking the victim’s money or refusing to give them money for expenses
• Looking at or acting in ways that scare the person they are abusing
• Controlling who the victim sees, where they go, or what they do
• Dictating how the victim dresses, wears their hair, etc.
• Stalking the victim or monitoring their victim’s every move (in person or also via the internet and/or other devices such as GPS tracking or the victim’s phone)
• Preventing the victim from making their own decisions
• Telling the victim that they are a bad parent or threatening to hurt, kill, or take away their children
• Threatening to hurt or kill the victim’s friends, loved ones, or pets
• Intimidating the victim with guns, knives, or other weapons
• Pressuring the victim to have sex when they don’t want to or to do things sexually they are not comfortable with
• Forcing sex with others
• Refusing to use protection when having sex or sabotaging birth control
• Pressuring or forcing the victim to use drugs or alcohol
• Preventing the victim from working or attending school, harassing the victim at either, keeping their victim up all night so they perform badly at their job or in school
• Destroying the victim’s property

STOP Domestic Violence volunteer training is held frequently throughout the year. If you or anyone you know might be interested in volunteering, please call (518) 563.6904 or email for more information.